We Face Death Together To Find More
Love And Meaning In Every Single Moment
Face mortality instead of running from it.
Find meaning in your daily life.
Understand REAL love in practice.
If you're living on autopilot spending your time in front of screens trying to find purpose you've probably been told that taking a vacation, doing a medicine journey or going on a crazy adventure would help you find meaning in life.
But in reality, most of those escapes from 'normal life' bring temporary shifts that aren’t actually life-changing because they don’t stick with you for life… just a couple of days and then you’re back to the day-to-day world of a modern, always connected human.
LIVE A PURPOSEFUL, MEANINGFUL LIFE
Never feel that sinking feeling of, “Oh my god, I’m wasting my life here,” again.
FIND GRATITUDE IN WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE
Your tools are always there when the adrenaline has worn off from your “next-level” spiritual experiences.
REALIZE YOU’RE NOT ALONE
You’re in a collective of emotionally mature, supportive explorers and we’re growing through challenges together.
PRACTICE SELF-LOVE ON A DEEPER LEVEL
No more life on autopilot tending to everyone else's needs and forgetting your own health, joy, fulfillment and impact.
The truth is, most life-long seekers don’t find long-lasting results that create real change and end up unsatisfied and unfulfilled on an endless search for meaning.
It's not your fault. You’ve been sold the hero’s journey. Go far away, find the depths of despair, meet your demons, destroy them, fly home business class. Thats the only way to change - be epic! do epic shit! Otherwise you’re a loser. But the truth is, we don’t need to go on a cinematic quest to get to the one truth that we’re looking for — we’re all gonna die.
It's not easy to settle into a life that is guaranteed to end at some point, that's why we so often look to push our boundaries and deny death as long as possible, so we don't have to face it when we eventually can't summit the highest peaks, run ultra marathons or kill our egos in foreign jungles.
Here’s the problem:
We spend huge amounts of time and money separating our real, sometimes monotonous, lives from our growth journeys and looking for answers to our existence outside of ourselves. This keeps us in cycles of self-inquiry and stagnation without ever getting to the deep, rich work of living with purpose for yourself, your relationships and the planet.
We become automatons living for temporary, intensely “meaningful” experiences in the jungles of distant lands, jumping off cliffs on the weekend or discovering our next healer. We lose connection to a life that feels intensely meaningful every day, hour and minute. Life runs out for us all and when we aren't able to land the purpose plane and stake our claim in what we truly stand for, we run the risk that our life ends unfinished.
There is a path…
There is a path to shifting this pattern of escape and routine. The only way out is through. As we say, you’re gonna die, but not from this. Coming to terms with our mortality in a real way on a regular, moment by moment basis, drives us to live more purposeful, meaningful lives every day, and it’s not as depressing as you might think. 😏 Instead of the fumbling ups and downs of our journeys, we can settle into a reality of rich, deep, loving mortality and suck up the fresh juice of life while we still have it. It doesn't have to be scary or dismal, it can be a true expansion, a discovery of meaning in the life you already have and have always had within.
4 REASONS MOST LIFE-LONG SEEKERS FAIL TO LEAD FULFILLING LIVES
MISTAKE 1: We look outside ourselves for answers. We throw money at the problem and go on long walkabouts to discover a self that was always inside.
Actually, in truth, there's so many things we can do for free, every day in our lives, that can deepen our connection to our bodies, the value of life while we have it and living on purpose. You don't need to spend a ton of money or leave your home to begin a life with meaning.
MISTAKE 2: We tell ourselves; 'I need to get money, power, fame... then I can figure out how to live on purpose.'
Sure, having resources to support your lifestyle is super important, but ask any rich dude - money doesn’t equal purpose or happiness but it can make things easier. There are plenty of miserable millionaires. What if you could learn how to enjoy the present while working toward that lifestyle? Gentle reminder: tomorrow isn't promised. Don’t put off living your fullest, richest life now with the assumption that you’ll make up for it in the “future.” Too many well-intentioned people have wasted their lives saying, Someday. It’s possible to generate the resources we need to thrive and do it with purpose and integrity.
MISTAKE 3: We think facing mortality is depressing and painful.
Yeah it is! Ever been to a funeral? It sucks! But, just like most things, death is not one note.
Addressing death — and ultimately, acknowledging what it is to live — can be a moving, funny, awkward, enlightening, unifying experience. It’s the only thing we all have in common.
We can choose to live our lives as if we’re immortal and be unprepared when death catches up with us when a parent falls ill or a friend dies, or we can begin to practice a new way of relating to being a human and discover the rich rewards that come with it. You don't need a life threatening event to happen to you or a loved one to integrate the lessons that come with finding purpose and meaning. You don't need to keep waiting until you're wise with experience to gain wisdom from practice.
MISTAKE 4: We think; 'If I start questioning all these aspects of my life it will quickly topple everything I've built thus far and my world will go up in flames.'
The challenges that come as we begin to assess our priorities and attention can be difficult to face at first, but with trust and patience they bring incredible, life-altering rewards. And yeah, you might blow up your life.
But! Would you prefer to wake up in 25 years and be like, “Oh shit, what have I been doing this whole time?” or would you rather handle it now? Small problems become big problems when we don’t address them in ample time. Why risk wasting your precious life? It’s the only one you’ve got.
This is an open invitation into an ongoing exploration around love, life and death with others who are on the same path.
WELCOME DEATHFRIENDS
Transform Your Life From Numb Routines
To Living On Purpose With Others Navigating The Path
Ethan Lipsitz - Death Friend / Camp Death Director / Love Extremist
Hey ya’ll, this is Ethan, your DFF (Death Friend Forever). I’ve taken everything I learned in the last 5 years facing a terminal brain cancer diagnosis to build the best collective experience to help life-long seekers go from living on monotonous auto-pilot, aka '‘wtf am i doing with my life?!’, to a life of purpose, depth and love every day.
* I know you're busy and you often pack your downtime with big growth opportunities and celebrations. We do this work as part of our daily lives, it's not an escape, it's a series of new habits that can help us live more deeply. We welcome your curiosity and choice to show up to this community in your regular chill clothes.
* This isn't a spiritual or hippy dippy trip. Our practice is grounded in honest lived experience with terminal disease and death. You bring your own self-inquiry through journaling, mindfulness, creativity and conversation and we facilitate the group discussion, practices and support.
* It's not a one-and-done thing, you're encouraged to take these practices with you into your daily life and continue ongoing practice with us as a like-minded community that isn't afraid to talk about what truly matters in our lives.
* For $10/month you get access to community and monthly practices, access to leaders who have spent their lives studying purpose, love and death and a group of like-minded souls seeking answers and exercises to deepen their relationship to life and living on purpose.
Here’s How It Works*
1. At the beginning of Every Month You Get a Prompt emailed to your inbox that offers a practice or exercise related to mortality…
Example:
Imagine tonight is your last night in this body. What are you thankful for? Who do you need to forgive? To whom should you apologize? Who do you want to reach out to and send love? Write these answers in your journal.
Cool, now come back to the probability that it’s not your last night, how can you actually do these things now? Write a to-do list focused on uplifting 2-3 relationships this month with specific actions that make clear your love and care for the other person. It could be a simple text, sending flowers, $5 for a fancy coffee or maybe an in-person visit. Think of what would be meaningful for you both and do it this month.
2. Halfway through the month you get another email with some resources (readings, podcasts, videos, films…) to explore around mortality, death and LIVING life on purpose.
Example:
Check out our Clubhouse salon about medical aid in dying with Erin Granat who co-wrote, co-directed and co-produced ‘Moon Manor’.
Get to know Alua Arthur, the Death Doula behind Going With Grace.
Learn about the power of discussing death at the dinner table with Michael Hebb and Carla Fernandez.
4. Deathfriends will participate in the evolution of the community and be part of the process in developing additional group resources like a library, online chat forum, accountability circles and other valuable tools to support the friends.
3. Towards the end of the month you’re invited to a private deathfriends community call to discuss the monthly prompt and other themes that have come up for you.
5. You will receive periodic gifts in the mail, invites to events with leaders and special guests, discounts on future workshops and access to limited edition deathfriends swag and art.
HERE’S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU JOIN
Monthly email prompts supporting your growth in finding purpose and meaning in your life through challenging your relationship to mortality
Activities you can do at any time designed to deepen self love, relationships and life purpose
Private invite to monthly group support calls where we discuss the prompts and what’s coming up for us personally
Direct access to deathfriends leadership and fellow community members
Love Extremist & deathfriends swag and pins
Private invites to special events
Exclusive access to ongoing Love Extremist community, experiences and programming
FAQS:
Why should I confront my mortality?
Learning how to engage with challenging parts of life, like mortality and grief, are powerful ways to grow. It’s also important to have peers and tools to confront these challenges on a regular basis. Perhaps you’re seeking to level up in where you give your attention. Maybe you want to learn how to love your life more deeply or with more impact. Or it could just be you never think about death and dying and you’d like to get more comfortable. All of these considerations are great reasons to join us.
How does deathfriends work?
Deathfriends is a monthly program and ongoing community where you will receive regular emails that prompt you to take an action or consider a new approach to life. Each prompt is informed by the challenges we face as people moving through life, supporting loved ones, addressing disease and grief and finding purpose to live more deeply and authentically. Throughout the program as a member of the community you have access to the Love Extremist leadership and other peers who can support you personally as challenges arise. As a deathfriend you’ll also receive some sweet goodies and special invites from the Love Extremist project.
Why is Love Extremist leading deathfriends?
We believe love and death are intrinsically related. We grieve what we love when it’s gone and in deepening our relationship to death, we’ve found a deeper connection to life. Ethan, founder of the Love Extremist project, has had numerous confrontations with mortality over the past 5 years and his experience fighting grade III brain cancer as well as his partner and friends will inform how we support you through this journey. Our intention is to use the principles we’ve learned through studying love in practice to support all participants in a deep dive through dying and living with intention and love.
How does this relate to Camp Death?
After two successful sessions of Camp Death and one end of year Death Rituals program, we’re taking the feedback from over 40 participants to create an ongoing community of practice and support. Instead of 2 week intensive workshops we’re stretching our program into monthly prompts which gives a more spacious approach to this work and supports our integration into daily life. The intention is to make this process more accessible by lowering the cost and reducing the time commitment.
What makes you the person to teach this to me?
I spent my 20s seeking purpose and love by doing lots of wild adventures, living abroad, taking big risks, starting a business, meeting healers and going on heroic journeys. Then when I hit my 30s I was diagnosed with brain cancer after experiencing a horrifying seizure in my sleep. Abruptly everything changed; I went through brain surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, diet and other lifestyle shifts and was forced to focus on my own health and well being so I could survive and heal. Since my diagnosis in 2017 I’ve had daily reminders of mortality; taking medication, getting MRIs, fasting, avoiding all sugars and trying various treatments with doctors and therapists. In addition to getting as healthy as I can be, I’ve also discovered love. I’ve found self-love in prioritizing my health and well-being, I’ve met the love of my life and I’ve built the Love Extremist project as a platform to explore and define love through workshops, conversations, interviews, writing, music, art and much more. After a sketchy MRI in 2021, which turned out to be a false alarm, I have dug deeper on my own mortality and created a format to share my discoveries and learnings in community to support others in living richer, deeper lives without going through the whole cancer thing. I also love hosting conversations and creating workshops and have been doing this work, as well as working as a camp counselor since High School so it’s not my first rodeo.
If I can’t join the group calls, will I still get the most out of the program?
Yes! All calls are optional and recorded for those who miss so no worries if you can’t make them. As a dues paying member you get access to all the content. You can do these practices and use these tools over and over again and you will!
What do I get again?
Monthly email prompts supporting your growth in finding purpose and meaning in your life through challenging your relationship to mortality
Activities you can do at any time designed to deepen self love, relationships and life purpose
Private invite to monthly group support calls where we discuss the prompts and what’s coming up for us personally
Direct access to deathfriends leadership via email
Love Extremist & deathfriends swag and pins
Private invites to special events
Exclusive access to ongoing Love Extremist community, experiences and programming
I’m not a touchy-feely person, will this be for me?
You are in complete control of your experience and how you respond to the prompts. You can choose to participate in the group calls, show up and just listen or even opt out if that’s best for you. The goal here is to challenge ourselves to go a bit deeper that we may normally go and find others to support through their exploration of life and purpose while we explore our own. We seek people who are good listeners and are up for a challenge, just like the peak experiences you may seek, this is about cultivating that impact without the high highs and the come down afterwards.
I’m already pretty depressed, because pandemic. Is this gonna be somber and sad?
The point of deathfriends is to make this process fun, creative and impactful for you. It’s not going to always be a joyous party but we’re going to create space for us to process together so you don’t have to go through these challenging themes alone. Through this community you’ll create new relationships you can continue to nurture and grow as life continues and we practice together.
Is this helpful for people experiencing grief and loss?
Everyone processes loss and grief differently. If you are lacking supportive practices to work through your grief then this is a great opportunity to develop some. If you seek a community to hold you and support you in grief, to honor your loss and to be vulnerable in their own challenges and seek your support then deathfriends is definitely the move.
Got more questions?
Email Us
HERE’S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU JOIN US
Monthly email prompts supporting your growth in finding purpose and meaning in your life through challenging your relationship to mortality
Activities you can do at any time designed to deepen self love, relationships and life purpose
Private invite to monthly group support calls where we discuss the prompts and what’s coming up for us personally
Direct access to deathfriends leadership and fellow community membersl
Love Extremist & deathfriends swag and pins
Private invites to special events
Exclusive access to ongoing Love Extremist community, experiences and programming
HERE’S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU JOIN US
Monthly email prompts supporting your growth in finding purpose and meaning in your life through challenging your relationship to mortality
Activities you can do at any time designed to deepen self love, relationships and life purpose
Private invite to monthly group support calls where we discuss the prompts and what’s coming up for us personally
Direct access to deathfriends leadership and fellow community members
Love Extremist & deathfriends swag and pins
Private invites to special events
Exclusive access to ongoing Love Extremist community, experiences and programming
deathfriends is perfect for you if …
✔️ You're struggling to find meaning in your life
✔️ You’re never satisfied with your job, your new partner, your home, your new car, etc. and searching for fulfillment
✔️ You're secretly afraid of dying with nothing to show for your life
✔️ You don't have a community of peers who you can go deep with
✔️ You don't know how to deal with mortality in a healthy way
✔️ You’ve tried every plant medicine ceremony and gotten every stamp on your passport, but you’re still disconnected from the clarity you seek
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you’re ready to join deathfriends